Whirlwind of Grief
It feels strange and a little freeing to be writing this. It's been almost a year since I've written anything and it's taken months of convincing myself to let my busy mind flood onto this page. Not because of a lack of time, or desire, or words, but mostly because grief is a weird thing. It traps you. It's suffocating. And I think now, it's not that the pain isn't present or very much still real, but I finally was able to take a breath. A breath of fresh air, and maybe it'll be another three months before I can take my next, but I know now that God gives us enough oxygen to make it to the next inhale. 2018 was a year of grieving. It was also the best year of my life. A weird paradox that I really didn't know what to do with. Every ounce of me found it to be conflicting, and confusing, and overwhelmingly painful. Being able to bring joy to my current circumstances required this process of grieving what I had walked away from and accepting that my curre